Imagine an introductory conversation:
Hi, what’s your name? – Mikhail Emelianov.
Ah, where are you from? – I’m from New Jersey.
No, I mean where are you originally from? – Um… Eastern Europe, what about you?
I’m from Michigan – No, I mean where are you originally from?
?! [followed by awkwardness]
Perverse Egalitarianism 
Africa. So the Leakeys tell me.
Monkeys. Did you evolve, or were you created?
Several billion years ago my mama was an amino acid and my daddy was a lightning strike.
An unimaginably dense matter/energy pellet at the origins of the known universe. You?
I think if I were to write a rock song (of unimaginable awesomeness and gut-busting rocktitude), it would most certainly begin with a simple but powerful
My daddy was a lightning strike
[powerful guitar riff]
My mama was an animo acid
[pure rock and/or roll all the way]
I don’t really need any more lyrics, do I?
this could also easily be a rock ballad not unlike this one
No offense, Jackson, but it’s clearly this tune that Carl must have had in mind.
The funniest thing about the post is that Emelianov actually is from New Jersey, but tends to fake a Slavic accent to compensate for an awkward Russian-sounding name…
Boy, the BeeGees really are taking it primordial. I might coulda had something more like this in mind.
Drat, blew the tag. This: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NZl_Ye3TKaI